The Insane Follow-Ups To 5 People Who Memed Into Our Hearts

The internet is a fickle thing. One minute you’re riding high on a viral video, the next you’re getting arrested for public masturbation. Because the life expectancy of a meme is about half that of a mayfly, most people don’t bother following up on your story. If they did they would learn …


The “Rent Is Too Damn High” Guy Made An Amazing Music Video( And Probably Wasn’t Paying Rent That Whole Time )

In early 2010, the New York governor’s race was heating up. The incumbent governor backed out of the race, leaving Democrat Andrew Cuomo pretty much unopposed. He won easily. Did I tell “heating up”? I’m sorry. I meant “boring as shit.”

Normally, people would move on having never learned about any of the other candidates.( After all, how many crazies run for office all over America ?) But then arrived Jimmy McMillan, the leader of the “Rent Is Too Damn High” Party, whose on-the-nose slogan, meticulously groomed mutton chops, and strange Victorian attire was pretty much a recipe for viral-dom. Once he was featured in an auto-tune video, that was that.

Sing it with me: “The-rent is too-damn HIGH! ”

Of course McMillan lost the vote by a lot, but he knew he had something special. He ran for mayor in 2013, this time spending someone else’s life savings on his own surprisingly competent hip-hop music video. The video opens with J-Mills watching the news, flabbergasted that the rent is still too damn high, goddamn it! It’s as if all of his efforts were for naught! He gets so pissed, he takes it to the streets, and to a punching bag, all while wearing various combinations of suits and ties.

Youtube/ animalnewyork
The fact that it is clearly professionally produced and isn’t just crappy green screen is nearly funnier .

After trying for the governorship again ( and starring in his fair share of D-level commercials ), McMillan supposedly discontinued politics and offered the party, trademarked slogan and all, for sale. Perhaps the fame was getting to him, or perhaps it was because shortly after “hes been gone” viral it came out that, um … he hadn’t been actually paying rent for years. That would be like if the President ran golfing his first month in office, after complaining that the previous President was golfing too much! Haha! See, ’cause it would be ironic!

Speaking of, McMillan endorsed Donald Trump for President, because a human who would never give a dime to a homeless veteran outside his own hotel was apparently “the only one” supporting veterans.

Yes, Jimmy. Yes you did .


Monkey Jesus Is Now A Soulless Tourist Attraction

Back in 2012, Cecilia Gimenez gained internet fame after she attempted to “fix” an old paint of Jesus called “Ecce Homo, ” only to wholly bastardize the early-2 0th-century fresco into “Monkey Jesus.”

Nailed it .

After she became a laughingstock for her earnest try at amateur art restoration, Gimenez tried to stay out of the spotlight. However, the small Spanish village in which the paint sits is now a tourist attraction dedicated not to the historical significance of the piece, but to Gimenez’s botched Beast-Messiah. Guests pay a Euro to view the “painting” as it hangs behind obstacles …

… and afterwards are greeted by a gift shop that is about as soulless as it looks.

It seems the church told “eh, tourism fund is tourism money” and put the “improved” image on everything from mugs to hurl pillows in an attempt to raise funds. And it’s apparently worked, since hundreds of thousands have flocked to see the Triple-Chinned Savior.

The church even built a history wall that appears to be at least 50 percent dedicated to Gimenez, which would be like adding a separate placard in the Louvre because someone sneezed on the Mona Lisa. Oh, and don’t forget to take a pic in the cut-out and check in on Facebook.

The joke got ridiculously out of hand, but luckily most of the money went to Gimenez and Church charitable funds( not to mention the tourism fund coming in to surrounding communities ). So if you look at it that way, Gimenez actually did improve the painting.


An Internet Meme Ruined A Taiwanese Model’s Career

Once upon a day, a Taiwanese model named Heidi Yeh did a shoot for a plastic surgery company that she thought was a small task. The ad featured her and a “husband” posing with children with eyelids Photoshopped to be style thinner than the parents’. The transcript on the ad told “the only thing you’ll have to worry about is how to explain it to the kids.” Obviously this appears to be racist as shit, but remember that in Asia it’s common for people to get their eyes “westernized, ” which is exactly the service that the plastic surgery firm was selling.

The internet, being what it is, determined the photo and reconstituted it into the meme below, then started spreading a rumor that the family was real, and that the “husband” sued Yeh after finding out that she had lied about getting plastic surgery. The whole thing pointed to a Chinese tabloid story as evidence of its truth, which you might as well take with a truckload of salt, driven immediately up your ass.

The rumor spread in so far that Yeh’s family started asking her about it. She claims her( real) boyfriend breaking with her over the embarrassment and companies stopped dedicating her work because they thought she’d actually had surgery, which for the record, she hasn’t. She sued the ad agency for breach of contract.

I get that it’s hard to sympathize with a model who, if we take her term for it, lost out on hundreds of thousands of dollars, but no one should have to suffer for a meme. Unless you’re Scumbag Steve.


The Story Behind The Kangaroo Puncher Is Actually Really Sad

Last December the internet lost its mind over footage of a human from Australia punching a kangaroo in the face to save his dog. It had everything: an amazing video, adorable animals, and a genuinely debatable moral quandary( right up there with “was it OK to kill Cecil in order to raise money for conservation? ” and “was that dress blue or black? ” ). Regardless if sucker-punching a kangaroo in the noggin’ is socially acceptable, the video was incredible, and racked up 40 million deserved views on YouTube.

This video sure was hilarious, but the story behind the video is actually pretty sad. Apparently in June 2016, a bunch of Aussies went on a boar hunting trip-up because it was the dying wish of one of their buddies, Kailem Barwick. After getting the footage, they sold it to a YouTube channel who published it six months later. Regrettably, Barwick had succumbed to his cancer that month — the poor guy died mere days before his final wish ran viral. His only solace is that he got to witness this in person.

As for the puncher, he was actually a freakin’ zookeeper. Not sure if they have to take some kind of oath upon employment, but I would imagine at least two of the ethics points involve not punching the animals in the goddamn face.


The Creator Of Prancercise Is Ridiculously Paranoid About The World Stealing Her Idea

It all started with Joanna Rohrback’s Youtube video. In it, she demonstrates how to Prancercise, a kind of equestrian-like jogging that is about to take the world by blizzard. It looked ridiculous. Blend in some cheesy boulder chords sprinkled with prominent camel toe and you’ve got a one-way ticket to viral town.


Prancercise taking off became a blessing and a curse for Rohrback. While she spent the the better part of the last few decades trying to find success with Prancercise, she couldn’t assist but suppose the world was out to steal her brilliant idea.

In a write-up in the Miami New Times , Rohrback was of the view that the trademark symbol be used after every mention of Prancercise( legal disclaimer: just pretend they’re in this article too, I’m not doing that crap ). When a British Tv display came to township, she wouldn’t even explain her various prance motions on camera, which include gems such as “The Prancewalk, ” “The Prancegallop, ” and “The Prancetrot.” Because no one could possibly figure out the secret to galloping around like a horse with two transgress legs from the YouTube video.

Her friend told the paper that “[ Rohrback] was always worried about people stealing it … She had the keys to the Hilton Gym[ on Hallandale Boulevard] and only came in early and late.” Though, would find a 60 -year-old woman trot around like a lunatic even turn heads in Florida? When she decided to write a book, Rohrback hired a photographer on Craigslist( as you do ). During the session( in a public Dunkin’ Donuts ), she made him sign documentation “says hes” wouldn’t steal the idea. He signed it, despite feeling, in his words, “dumbfounded” at how strict she was being. But hey, when you’re a Craigslist photographer, a gig’s a gig. She even believed the bad reviews on Amazon were the work of jealous competitors, like Zumba and Jazzercise, as if they actually saw her as a threat.

This appears to all stem from the fact that she wasn’t quite in on the joke. For instance, John Mayer was such a fan he made her the starring of his music video for “Paper Doll.” After it was released she claimed she was “unhappy” with how it was edited, which is an amazing statement given that the entire video is her Prancercising for four uninterrupted minutes in one long cut. One day she was invited to magistrate a drunken Prancercise competition at a casino, which was only frustrating because no one had the balls to explain to her that the whole world just thought her dance was silly.

But alas, her paranoia stems even further back — decades back in fact, when she first had her “Eureka! ” moment and came up with the routine. This was a great, historic achievement that just needed 20 more years to ferment. But how would she keep all those leeches from taking her idea until then, pre-YouTube?

Why, you just file that shit in the Library Of Congress, apparently.

Chris has a party game called Cheer Up ! that you can download for free. Check it out on Facebook, too .

Read more:

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *